Call me the reprimander.

Gyms are strange places for studying human behavior.

In undergrad, I was always perplexed by the slews of sorority girls (ADPi girls excluded, naturally) who would come to the gym in full make up, hair carefully styled, and dressed in some tiny top with matching (in minimalism and color) spandex bottoms. They would get on the treadmills and "run" for an hour on the lowest possible setting. With all the treadmills lining the front window, it just seemed like they were there to be seen. I really think most of them took as long to get ready to go to the gym as they did to go to Chubby's 2 Phat Nite Clubs in 1, and they probably wore about the same amount of clothing.

Now that I've gotten around in the gym world a little more, this phenomena isn't so unexplained. Guys, for some reason, have the idea that girls go to the gym to meet guys. I mean, if a girl ventures into the weight area, she couldn't possibly have any reason to be there except to meet a guy, right? Clearly, all guys have free rein to hit on her as much and as often as possible: preferably 3-4x between each set. Having determined that "Can you help me move this 45 lb. weight off the squat machine?" is actually code for "Let's go back to your place and do it," I now ask the gym employees for assistance whenever I need to remove a heavy weight. (They are very annoyed by this, btw.)

But...even shameless pick up attempts and tiny pink shorts do not annoy me as much as that group of people who forget that other people belong to the gym: showing a complete disregard for common courtesy or even posted rules. I'd group these people into two categories.

The resters. At most gyms, there are not circuit areas (discussed below) but people moving about doing a few sets on a machine and moving on. Resters spend most of their time at the gym resting. They get on a machine and do four or five reps, lasting a grand total of 15 seconds, then rest for five minutes. Repeat. The result being, of course, that they monopolize a machine or weight bench for 20 minutes but were only actually working out for 45 seconds. It's really hard to call these people out on their discourtesy, because they are probably unaware of it.

Then, you have the circuit setters. These people go to a circuit area, an area designated for those people who want to train by doing one set at each machine quickly and going to the next (it adds in cardio to weight training), and treat it like their home gym. At my gym, there are signs ALL over the circuit area explaining that it is for one quick set revolving in a circuit. There are at least two signs redirecting people who want to do normal sets to the appropriate area. The circuit setters don't care. They sit on a circuit machine and casually do four or five sets, with breaks in between, watching Oprah and talking on their cells. Really. On Saturday, I saw the most egregious example: two girls were not only doing sets, but they were alternating between them. I waited on them once, but when they moved to another machine I wanted to use, I had to say something. First, I politely pointed to the sign and then explained that there was an identical machine right there in the normal part of the gym. They rolled their eyes and begrudgingly went. Since then, I have personally assumed the role of circuit reprimander. I had to do again tonight.

James also always points out "that guy" i.e. the guy who uses BOTH pulley systems...occupying 2 machines and blocking a walkway in the mean time. It is really mind boggling how people can be socially unaware.

I'm going to make a badge that says Gym Sheriff.

At least I found someone to boss around here.